When we first moved in to our house on the coast our then 2 year old daughter Madison sneakily figured out how to work the child proof door knob protectors, ironically I was still mastering them, but for her they were a cinch. It was after I found her in my bathroom covered in fingernail polish, Q-tips, mascara and lotion that I decided we needed to start locking our bedroom door. One of the problems with our house is that the top of the door frame is surrounded by 6 inch molding, very beautiful, yet unreachable for a shorty like me. And so I found a cute little shelf and asked David to hang it outside our bedroom door so I could keep the key to the door on it.
After a long day at work and a longer day dealing with a 2 year old and a wife who was in the early stages of morning sickness, David hung the shelf. It wasn’t until the next day that I realized it was upside down, an easy mistake; it does look similar on both sides and is indeed functional either way. I immediately called him to tell him it needed to be turned around. To which he replied, “Uh, oh sorry, okay, I’ll do it when I get a chance.”
Weeks went by and the shelf remained the same, every time I walked by the shelf I would become irritated, I mean how long would it take him to fix this, what like five minutes? (At the time it didn’t occur to me that I TOO COULD FIX IT! But for some reason I kept putting it on him). Many friends would come over and comment on the shelf, I just kept saying,
“Yeah Dave’s gonna fix it one of these days.” And then it hit me, why should he fix it? Why should he have hung it in the first place? I was the one who couldn’t reach the key when it was on the door frame, he reached it just fine. There was no reason for him to hang the shelf for himself, it was all for me.
So today over 2 years later the shelf is still upside down and it will be until the day we move. He’s offered to fix it many times but I love it that way. Every time I go in and out of our bedroom I see the shelf and it is a reminder to me. Not of how I was once so irritated by it, but a reminder of how much my husband does for me, just to make me happy. It’s something that tells me over and over again that even though he’s exhausted, drained, and would probably rather be watching some random sporting event on TV, he will still take the time to do something just for me. It may not be perfect, but who’s to say what is perfect and what’s not? I’m certainly not an expert on what’s right and wrong, although I do tend to criticize more than I should.
So to David, thank you so much for being so amazing to me, thanks for putting up with all my annoying moods and directions, thank you for picking out the beautiful purple tomato cages instead of the regular metal ones at Bi-Mart (just because you knew I’d like them), thank you for peeling and cutting up the cucumber for lunch without even being asked. You amaze me. Oh and I’m sorry about the fireplace, YOU’RE RIGHT, I WAS WRONG, your way will work fine, my way was just some random attempt for control. You do an amazing job, I have so much respect for you, I promise to work harder to show that to you, and I’ll also work harder at keeping my mouth shut, when my hands aren’t willing to participate in getting the work done.
I hope that everyone that is reading this has some sort of upside down shelf in their life, may its imperfection bless you and remind you that your loved one’s aren’t people you hire who you can boss around. They are the most important people in your lives and should be treated as special treasures.
