It's all happening!

Wow, this has been a crazy, busy hectic month!

Many exciting and scary things are happening, first we're moving to Klamath Falls. It's a bitter sweet move for sure, I'm sad to be leaving my friends here on the coast, but so excited to be closer to family and friends down in Southern Oregon. And also I'm just solar powered I need the sunshine to keep my spirits up, and on the coast we just don't get enough of the good stuff!

The second very exciting thing is that I'm publishing my novel, Waypoint - Cache Quest: Oregon through Amazon. It will be available on Amazon in September, and shortly after in book stores and libraries.

I finished the website, sans the official book cover and more character info, and am working on the book trailer for advertising online. It's very exciting and very scary, it could end up being huge, it could end up being nothing, but I'm focusing on the positive and the "what if..."

So when you get a chance check out the web site, let me know what you think! If all goes well with the first book's sales then I will be writing one for every state in the U.S.

I always love to have feedback, good and bad... how else will I know to change things, right?

www.waypointbookseries.com

WAYPOINT- An excerpt from my novel.

Lately a lot of people have been asking what's going on with my writing and my trying to get published. Well, getting published I have found is a long and tricky, anxiety ridden road, but I've been keeping busy with revisions and of course writing this blog.
So today I thought I would kill two birds with one stone and post a small excerpt of my novel, WAYPOINT. This is middle-grade fiction, written for readers between the ages of 8 and 15, however I have noticed a lot of adults seem to be enjoying it as well.

So here ya go, a little taste of WAYPOINT...

Chapter 3

Lacey screamed again, “Ben!” but didn’t hear any response. Fear overcame her, what if he was dead? The thought made her throat tighten; whatever had happened inside wasn’t good. She stepped back from the old red door then using as much force as she could she kicked it in. The door flew open, smacking the interior wall with a loud thud. She glanced inside before entering, she couldn’t see Ben anywhere. She looked up the spiral staircase, then around the floor one more time, just in case she had missed him in one of the shadows. He wasn’t there. Panic constricted her chest; she grabbed her cell phone, but didn’t have the nerve to call her sister. She would find him, she had to.

***

Ben closed his eyes and opened them again to make sure he was seeing correctly. It was as if his brain wouldn’t process the image above him. The structure of the lighthouse went deep into the ground, circling the walls was an ancient staircase winding slowly all the way up. It had to be over one hundred feet high. Ben didn’t think he had fallen that far, but it had all happened so fast. He squinted his eyes, and there like a tiny dot he saw the hole he had fallen through, it would take him ages to climb to the top.

He pulled himself to his feet, groaning with pain. He almost screamed as he stood, not because of the pain, but because there were thousands of human skulls staring back at him. They circled the walls all the way to the top, running parallel to the staircase. Each skull was set into the walls of the lighthouse, as if someone had carved shelves specifically for displaying them. But who had put them there? The question ran through Ben’s mind and then suddenly common sense took over and he started running up the stairs. Whoever had put them there probably wouldn’t mind displaying one more.

***

Lacey stepped into the lighthouse and noticed the hole in the floor just below the window. She looked down into the hole and was amazed to see such a huge deep cavern. Stairs circling the walls seemed to go on forever. She heard something; it was a pounding sound, coming from the staircase under her. She stuck her head into the hole, “Ben!” she yelled, her voice echoed loudly below her. She waited, praying that she would hear some sort of response.

“Help! I’m coming up as fast as I can!” Ben yelled back. Just as he felt a little relief he suddenly fell and smacked his face into the stairs, but they weren’t stairs anymore. The entire staircase had become a huge slide. He was sliding down so fast he couldn’t stop. What on earth was going on? One minute he is climbing stairs then suddenly they changed into a slide? The stairs must have folded in, but why?

As he reached the bottom he realized the answer. He flew off the slide and was thrown into the back of a figure standing in an old cape of some sort. The figure turned and looked down at Ben. It was an old man, with a long tangled beard. His deep eye sockets were almost black. He didn’t even look real, or maybe it was that he didn’t look alive.

Ben started to crawl backwards, as he turned over to stand the old man took the long staff he was holding and slammed it into Ben’s back. Ben smacked into the cold dirt floor. “Help!” Ben screamed. “Aunt Lacey, help!”

Lacey could barely hear what Ben was yelling, but it sounded like he was screaming for help. Something was going horribly wrong. She sat on the edge of the broken floor and slid onto the steep slide below her. “Well this will be fun.” She said to herself as she pushed off.

The ancient man towered over Ben, he was extremely frail and yet it looked as if he was ten feet tall. He reached down and grabbed Ben’s shirt with a twisted, knobby hand and pulled Ben to his feet. “Have you come to harm the light?” He asked, his voice whistling as it escaped his lips.

“What?” Ben’s voice shook as he tried to speak.

“The light, have you come to harm it? Why are you trespassing on this place?” The man was growing angry.

“I just came for the prize.” Ben pleaded. “The window was open, and I saw the prize, so I came in, but then I fell.”

“I saw you come through the window, most come through to harm the light.” The old man knelt next to Ben. “What is your name?” his warm smelly breath was burning Ben’s eyes.

“Ben.”

“Benjamin, do you know who I am?” His face came even closer to Ben’s. Now Ben could see that deep in those black sockets were small blue eyes. They were the bluest eyes Ben had ever seen, and strangely as Ben looked into them a calming sensation came over his body.

“No, I don’t… but did you kill all these people?” Ben responded.

“No, they were killed by those that have harmed the light.” His voice seemed to struggle as it escaped his old withered lips. “I have protected the light for two hundred years, when someone harms the light those in the sea parish. These skulls belong to them, all of those that have been lost at sea, because I failed to keep the light shining.” A tear dropped from his wrinkled cheek. “I keep the skulls to remind myself everyday why I must protect its brightness, for if it goes out, I fail once again.”

“But who harms the light?” Ben asked innocently.

“Some who come are simply here to destroy, Benjamin. They don’t understand the consequences of darkness, for when darkness wins the sea swallows up those who travel its waters.” He pointed to the skulls that spiraled up the walls, with a long curling finger, “The bodies come to me, as a punishment for allowing the light to go dark. Can I trust you Benjamin, to not harm the light?” His eyes pierced into Ben’s soul.

“Yes, I promise.” Ben replied. The old man closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

As Lacey rounded the last corner of the slide she saw the tall cloaked figure standing in front of Ben. Fear and anger came together within her chest; she had to protect her nephew. “Hey!” she yelled. The figure turned, spread his arms, and anger replaced his calm expression. Her speed was growing on the slide and as she hit the end she flew off and was headed right for the tall man who stood before her. As soon as her feet connected with his cloak his body exploded into millions of tiny pieces of glitter, they floated for a second, and then began to spiral around like a tornado, they became bigger and at the top of the tornado they began to separate and fly away. Ben and Lacey just stared as they saw each piece fly into each individual skull, lighting it like a jack-o-lantern. The entire cavern became bright, as if someone had just plugged in a string of white Christmas lights. Suddenly the floor shook, Lacey grabbed Ben’s arm. As the floor churned slats of wood on the slide lifted and once again became stairs.

“You can explain at the top!” Lacey said as she shoved Ben toward the stairs. They both began to run as fast as they could, the skulls of thousands of men lighting their way.

So, let me know what you think, I really don't know if its any good or not, I've gotten positive feedback from publishers and agents, but haven't gotten an offer so kinda makes me think that it might just suck! So leave me a comment, find me on facebook, or shoot me an email! Seriously, if it sucks I need to know so I can stop wasting my time on it.

Friendship is like peeing your pants...

Well, we’re moving again. This will be move number 26 in my life, I’m of course overwhelmed, excited and sad, it’s hard making friends knowing that ultimately you’ll be moving in the future, but here in Lincoln City I have made some wonderful friends, I feel so blessed. And I know that these people are why God brought me to this place.

Without these amazing friends I would have never gotten through the weather here, they were my rays of sunlight on the dreariest of rainy days. They supported me, made me laugh and loved me, they welcomed me, shared their lives, danced and drank, they came to the hospital when I had my second child, they hugged me and wiped my tears when my crazy post-partum depression made me unbearable to even those closest to me. These friends are priceless and I am so blessed. One friend in particular has seen me at worst and continued to love me.

So to Tamera, thank you for going on a blind date with me to the beach when I was brand new here, I know you are a blessing straight from God. Thank you for getting me out of the house, for continuing to call even when I was too depressed to pick up the phone. Thank you for my wonderful baby shower, the booty cake, the poopy diaper game, for Mama Mia, for Hubba overnighter’s, scrapbooking, tea parties, Twilight…so much to list, you are amazing, I love your family, your children, and you. I do, I love you. This world is so blessed to have you and I’m so thankful that God brought me here and blessed me with your presence, what a gift!

I know this sounds silly to those of you who have never experienced, deep true friendship, but I truly believe that friends are the family you get to choose. My life map has had many different paths, different street address, but in most locations there has been at least one person who has planted seeds in my heart. So when I feel sad about moving I have to remember that each move has more potential and having friends all over the world is an amazing gift. So it’s worth the stress, the questions, it’s worth watering those seeds and allowing them to grow, it’s worth not losing touch even though it’ll be a little harder to communicate.

Because as some wise and funny (by the way) person once said, “Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel its true warmth.”

R.E.S.P.E.C.T…Speaking a man’s language.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T…Speaking a man’s language.

I’m kind of tired of all the TV shows that show these irresponsible, idiot men. They tease them, show them making stupid mistakes and of course the wonderful wife is the heroin, who solves all the problems. Don’t get me wrong, I think women do a wonderful job in our society, but I think men are getting a bad rap.

Once upon a time I thought all men were stupid, I thought I knew more, was more articulate and got a job done better, but with the eye opening help from my sister, Steph, I can see that I had a blindfold on. There are men out there who are morons, sure, but the majority of them are hard working, smart, loving and deserve our respect.

As soon as I started respecting my husband and showing/telling him how much I respected him, my blindfold came off and I saw what a wonderful man he has always been, it was a change in my thinking and my vision of him that made the biggest difference. He has always been an amazing man, but once I realized it he became even more wonderful in my eyes.

David and I married young, I was 19, and he was 20. We did a lot of growing and learning together, and looking back now, sure we made our share of mistakes. But seriously once I learned his language, and was able to articulate how important he was to me our marriage truly blossomed. I don’t want to minimize a man’s needs or illustrate them to be simple creatures, but once I figured out how to effectively communicate to him life has been amazing. Think of it as having a wonderful friend who speaks a foreign language. When you tell them that you love them, they might not fully understand what that means to you, however when you become bi-lingual and start using words that they really value, then your relationship becomes that much fuller.

Respect has different meanings for men and women, for women we think this might mean having our bosses admire us, trust us and of course pay us what we feel we deserve, and for men it is similar, but I’ve found that it also means telling them regularly that we respect them. That we understand the sacrifices they’re making and that we trust them. When David and I were first married all decisions had to go through me, now when he brings something to my attention, I usually say, “ya know honey, I trust your judgment, you decide.” Since I have done this our finances, our home, his work, everything has turned around for the better. I had to get out of his way, he knew how to do things and make things wonderful the entire time but I was blocking him. I guess a lot of people, especially women will think I’m giving away my power, but really I’m allowing him to do what he does best, and I’m telling myself that I might not know best and so I made that change. Early on I realized that in marriage if one person is right, the other person is wrong, and nobody enjoys being wrong, and frankly when one person has to be right, both people lose!

I guess I’ve learned that the fastest way to be treated as an equal, to be treasured and to be trusted with any man, your father, father-in-law, grandfather, husband, brother, boss…whoever, is to tell them how much you respect them! For some women this might be hard, certainly there are men out there that don’t deserve our respect, but the ones that do need to be told how you feel. If not they may feel that they are being taken for granted. It’s not that you feel that way, but that we don’t know how to effectively communicate what they need to hear.

So ladies, give your men what they need, tell them how much you respect them, and show them how much they mean to you. Let’s face it there are plenty of losers out there, if you have a good, decent man, keep him by speaking his language. Also keep it interesting, mix things up, surprise them, you might just surprise yourself in the process.

We all need fertilizer.

I love spring time, the new growth on the plants, and the promise of warmer days ahead. Sometimes, and I say this tongue in cheek, even the rain feels good and cleansing. As I was weeding my flower bed though I realized that my poor plants have been neglected, they certainly have enough water, living on the coast, but they needed a good pick me up and so I fertilized them. I love all natural fertilizers; you know the ones made almost purely of rotten debris and well…poo.

As I was explaining to my four year old daughter how poo helps plants grow it occurred to me, we all need a bit of poo in our lives, or more appropriately, we all need some crap! I mean the kind of crap that drives us crazy, that keeps us frustrated and on our toes. The kind of crap that keeps us up at night, the kind of crap that makes us not want to pick up the phone when it rings. We like plants, need to be fertilized! Without the crap, or garbage in our lives, we wouldn’t make any changes, we wouldn’t grow.

Now while we and plants need good fertilizer, we have to make sure we aren’t over fertilizing our selves, just like a plant will wither with too much, there is only so much we can handle also, so we have to be good judges of our stress levels and we must determine which crap is good for us (in the long run) and which cannot be used for growth.

I also realized that we all have weeds in our life, which stunt our growth and steal our precious fertilizer, you know when you go through something really frustrating and powerful that could just be enough for you to make a positive change in your life, but you do something and neglect to make the change? Like perhaps you turn to an addiction, rather than dealing with the crap and growing from it.

Well I’m sick of it, I’m sick of going through the hard stuff, only to have the fertilizer that could benefit me be stolen by an enabling weed. I’m slowly going to pull out the weeds in my life, if I pull them out to quickly roots will be left behind and they’ll keep popping up, so slow and steady I want to remove them. I also want to fertilize with caution, by saying no more and not overloading myself, but being open to the kind of crap that really does have a purpose, even if I don’t understand it right now.

So be careful what you curse in your life, it could be the best mixture of fertilizer for you. It could be exactly what you need to make your next big beautiful growth spurt. Embrace the poo and rotten debris, grow from it, pull out weeds that steal your growth potential and hard earned fertilizer, and don’t forget to share, you never know when your experience, or crap, can help someone else get through their own.

I apologize about the crude nature of this post, if it offends you…well put on the big girl panties and deal with it, sometimes life is offensive!

Do you love me enough?

This past weekend I felt like I did at least of year’s worth of growing up. It was exhausting, humbling and an emotional roller coaster ride.

My Grandfather died, while I was in the room, talking to him. Right in front of my eyes he let go, I felt his soul leave; goose bumps covered my flesh, tears, panic and somewhere deep inside relief came over me.

I don’t do death, I haven’t for over 12 years, and sure death has come and been a part of my life, like everyone’s I suppose. But I have avoided it at all costs, due to my fear and an overwhelming need to protect myself.

On Thursday I got the call, Grandpa was sick, I told my mother that no, I wouldn’t be going to say goodbye. But sometime later that night I could hear my Grandfather’s voice asking, “Do you love me enough to be uncomfortable? Do you love me enough to let me go?” I course do, and so I drove, to what would be the most emotionally scary place in my life, to see my hero take his last breath, to tell my hero what he has meant to me, at first I didn’t think I was doing this for me, I told myself I was doing it for him, but now I understand that he was doing this for me. Him letting go in front of me was his last lesson for me: I was strong enough to get through it.

I’m still struggling with the visions of things I can’t un-see. I still have questions, but now I have a sense of peace, I know where my Grandpa is, and I know that death, while terrifying- is part of life, it is another birth into perhaps the greatest part of life.

I am honored that my Grandfather let go of his last grasp in this world while I was present, he was always so in control, a real patriarch. He would never want anyone to be uncomfortable in his presence, unless it was of course for their own good. And so I am humbled.

This is more of a diary entry than a blog, I suppose, somehow just writing these jumbled thoughts and emotions feels better than keeping them in my exhausted brain.

At this point I could be asking God why, but after that distinct moment I have my why. I know what myself and every other person in the room confirmed to me, he wasn’t gone; there was a very real presence of his soul, his being, with us. I guess a lot of people may think I’m crazy, or just trying to make myself feel better, but my faith has only grown stronger since this has happened. If I’m wrong and there is no God, then nothing will happen when I leave this earth, if I’m right then I know I will be in his presence and my grandfather’s, that’s an insurance policy I can’t refuse.

Grandpa, I’m so thankful for all of the lessons you taught me, most of all I’m so thankful for every single breath we shared.

“Life should not be measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”

Treasure Hunting

When it’s a sunny day on the coast or anywhere for that matter one of my favorite things to do is Geocache. For those who haven’t explored geocaching on their own, think treasure hunting with a GPS unit. Once you go to geocaching.com enter in your zip code and find a list of geocaches, you simply enter the longitude/latitude coordinates or waypoint into a GPS unit and you’re on your way.

Not only does geocaching get me out and into nature but it takes me places I haven’t been, or to places I have been but never truly appreciated in the past. Once you find your way, using your GPS unit, you look for the cache, which is usually some sort of metal ammo container or plastic weather proof tub, inside will be a log book to document your find and some nick naks of some sort, the rule of the game is to take something and leave something for someone else to take. It’s not only an awesome way to get out into nature, but a great way to get rid of unwanted small toys that you find yourself stepping on in the middle of the night, I have a basket on my junk drawer for such toys, that once the silent screaming and cursing is done I toss the offending toy into. I say silent because no pain is great enough to wake the kids and have to start the bedtime process over again.

Since I love geocaching so much I decided to start a geocaching journal, I feel very much like “Indiana Jones” when I write in my journal, it’s leather bound and has a cool design on the front, it’s something I picture the girls finding in the attic when I die, and of course since they would love geocaching too I would hope that they would go to all the places documented in the journal, heck maybe by then they could teleport there, but frankly I think that would diminish the value of a good treasure hunt, indeed the real treasure is the journey. I started this journal ages ago and have logged many caches over the years, so I thought I would share one of those entries with you.

From the journal:

July 17, 2008. CACHE NAME: Sied Creek. WAYPOINT: N44’57.700/ W124’00.293.

CLUES: West of sign.

We are new to Lincoln City; figured breaking out the GPS unit would be the easiest way to find some cool locations in this windy city. We quickly realize that driving and trying to read a hand held GPS unit is not wise and also can cause many arguments. Shauna takes over on navigation, David drives, and Madi is cheerfully holding her prize that she will leave behind for someone else after we find this cache. We know the general location of the cache, somewhere around Devil’s Lake. We quickly realize as we drive that Devil’s Lake is much bigger than we realized. We enter a park and follow the GPS unit, we unload Madi and get her bundled up, even in July it’s cold and chilly here. David is asking me questions; I am stumbling over rocks and actually walk into a garbage can as I’m too focused on the GPS unit in my hand. We wind our way up a path and come to a breath taking view of the lake, tall trees surround us, and the smell of camp fire is in the air. It’s really quite something. We search and search, we find one sign, and look to the west, nothing. After an hour we are all frustrated, and David takes over on the GPS unit, he quickly realizes that I’m way off and that while on the screen of the unit we are only an inch away we are really a mile away. MY BAD.

So we eat lunch at the small park we found, and take a lovely break before loading up and having David navigate and drive us. Within 5 minutes we are at a large sign that reads “Sied Creek” Damn he’s good! Once there we searched for about 20 minutes, there was a small trail, we followed it for some time, then decided the cache couldn’t be that far back into the brush, we went back to the sign and searched under some big trees, under the largest of trees was a pile of rocks, I decided to dig. It paid off quickly I found a small green lock box, the cache had been placed by Lincoln City Parks and Recreation. The rule in geocaching is to take something and leave something; we let Madi choose her treasure. She chose a small novelty bottle of bubbles from someone’s wedding; “Mark & Jenny” were printed on the outside. I thought this to be very sweet and hope that Mark and Jenny are still together. We left a map of Cedar Breaks National Park, Utah it was still in the truck from our last hiking trip there, we had all our favorite sites marked on it, I hoped that someone would find it useful and maybe even go to some of our spots.

We had a wonderful time today, the area was beautiful, I learned a lot about our new GPS unit, and Madi had fun, which is all that matters. We do want to go back to this area sometime soon to see if Parks and Rec will continue to clear the trails that lead through this awesome area.

Kind of cheesy I know, but we did have fun, and like I said the real treasure is in the journey, looking back on this now I remember feeling so frustrated at my GPS skills, or lack thereof, but David swooped in and got us back on track, I think that’s good for both of us. I also think it’s great that Madi gets to explore with us, to places none of us have been, but will hopefully continue to go to in the future. These are my real treasures, the memories of the breeze on my face, watching Madi dig through bushes, even running into that garbage can. The best is always unearthing the treasure, even though there are only trinkets inside it is very fulfilling…like I said very Indiana Jones.